inlove wid a playah

4 once i want 2 b d 1 that makes a player fall, i wana b d 1 who made d player change and giv d player's all.. 4 once i wana b d lady hu got d player 2 quit d game, 4get about d play, retire d jersey.. and draw hearts around my name..




-inday, nangangarap na maging bf si chris tiu

efols and orange

B1: oi pare ano speling ng orange?

B2: ang tanga mo naman pare! Anong gusto mo ispell ko...




ung color o yung prutas?!

let's drink!

"Giv strong drink 2 those hu r perishing, wine 2 those hu r in anguish. Let them drink & remember their misery no more."
PROVERBS 31:6-7




ayan.. Bible na ung nagsabi ah! Octoberfest na! :)

Inday goes bold

1 day, Katrina Halili bought a copy of FHM to c f shes stil #1. After reading it, tinapon nya ang mag sabay sigaw:




"Punyeta!!! Sino c INDAY?!"

don't text me, k?

I will be out of the country starting tomorrow for an overseas engagement. It would be appreciated if you would refrain from sending me forwarded messages until i come back, since I am on roaming and it costs Php 10.00 to receive each message. Thanks.

-text ni Inday kina Dodong at Manang bago siya umalis papuntang america

coming to america

Sa U.S. Embassy -

CONSUL: Why do you want to go to the U.S.?

AMO: To truhvel, to bisit frenz and fly the hurplane.

CONSUL: Denied!!! and you? (tanong kay inday)

INDAY: For life is a never ending pursuit of material and social satisfaction that i tender my great intent of actualizing a trans-Pacific journey to the land of milk and honey. An affable sanctuary where dreams become reality and a perfect habitat where souls like mine can reach the pedestal of freedom..

CONSUL: Lifetime multiple entry visa granted!

AMO: Potah ka INDAY!

professional growth

Do not limit me to the 4 corners of this luxurious abode. Expose me to the real challenges of the outside world. I want to grow as an individual with dynamic experiences.

-Inday, nagrereklamo dahil ayaw isama sa enchanted kingdom

terpsichore?!

The item in question is a childish representation of a prehistoric omnivore; purplish and with skills that include vocal calisthenics and terpsichore. It is also often mistaken for an engorged male sex organ.

-Inday, nasa toy store naghahanap ng barney

iodized salt! iodized salt! iodized salt tayo!

"ang itlog ay lulutang s baso pg may asin at lulubog kng wla, 2laran ang asin na ngpapalutang, ang taong matabang ay nakalulubog"

-Kuya Kim Atienza

p1 & p2

2 pipi naguusap -

PIPI1:
PIPI2:


PIPI1:


PIPI2:



PIPI1:

PIPI2:
PIPI1:


PIPI2:


PIPI1:


PIPI2:

PIPI1:
PIPI2:

Nkklngkot no? Nagaway cla. Sayang ung frndship! :(

is your water filtered?

s isang liblib n baryo-

BISITA:
Tatang, naiinom po b ung tubig d2?




TATANG:
Nasa'yo yn anak...




...kng gus2 m0ng nguyain, ayus lng. :)

get dat bol!

While it is indeed a thrill to watch two rival schools battle it out on the hardcourt, basketball does not define the greatness of either school.

-Inday, nakikisawsaw sa Ateneo-La Salle rivalry

trulalu o eklavu?

1. Trulalu
2. Eklavu
3. Eklavu
4. Trulalu
5. Eklavu
6. Trulalu
7. Trulalu
8. Eklavu
9. Trulalu
10. Trulalu

- batang bading nagsasagot ng true or false quiz

magSEXercise tayo tuwing umaga!

Sex Calorie Counter -

Lying: down: 90cal,
Standing up: 492cal,
Dog style: 426cal,
2nd round: 824cal,
Dresing up aftr sex while wife knocks at d door: 5000cal! :)

bakit hinugasan ni magdalena ang mga paa ni kristo?

Judas: Anong gimik yang hinuhugasan pa ni Magdalena and paa ni Bosing?

Pedro: Wag ka nga makialam! Drating ang araw..




ttwagn nla yang..




"FOOT SPA!" :)

anak vs aso

INA: anak! bat ba kanina pa masama tingin mo sa aso?




ANAK: e sya naman po nagsimula e!

sensitive si anak

1st day n school..

MOM 2 TEACHER: Very sensitive ang anak ko. Kung kailangan nyo syang disiplinahin, sampalin nyo lang yung...




...KATABI NIYA, mttkot na yun.

kutis ni inday

Amo1: Inday, ano gamit mo sa katawan? Ang kinis mo kasi eh!

Amo2: Siguro gumagamit ka ng papaya no?

Amo1: Baka naman kalamansi?




Inday: No!




"ONLY BELO TOUCHES MY SKIN! WHO TOUCHES YOURS?"




Lufeet ni inday!

inday vs ederlyn

Ederlyn: ikw b ang inday na cnsb nla? At cno k pra i2ld s akn ang yong ksikatan ngayong akoy na3himik na?Wla kang krapatan pra pantayan ako! Hayop ka!

Inday: My apologies. But the fact is, your glory days are over, my friend. I find it somewhat ridiculous that you persist in inviting people to come to your party that never existed. You are beginning to get on my nerves, Ederlyn. Damn you! Damn you, Bitch!

Ederlyn: *biglang nag nosebleed*

akyat bahay gang

Police interrogating 2 criminals -

P: Saan ka nakatira?

Criminal1: Wala po akong permanent adress.

P: Eh ikaw? San ka nakatira?

Criminal2: Kapitbahay ko po siya.

numbers trivia

Did you know that if you spell the numbers 1 to 999, not once will you write the letter A?...




It only appears once you reach 1000...




uyy! magbibilang! :p

professional dignity

As much as I want to indulge in the proliferation of such indecent and malicious information, I want to lift the stigma and alleviate society's perception of our profession...




-Inday, tumatangging mkipagtsismisan sa katulong ng kpitbahay

talasalitaan: x-rated edition

Pinoy Talasalitaan:

KALMOT- haplos ng nasasarapan

DAKMA- hawak ng sobra s pagnanasa

DAHAS- pwersang pakiusap sa maarteng kausap

GAHASA- romansang walang ligawan

BATI- pagroromansa s sarili s pamamagtan ng kamay

MAHAL- damdaming nakabubuntis

OH- sarap na pinipigil-pigil

OOH- sarap na di mapigil-pigil

OOOHHH- sarap na sarap na d papipigil

HAHAHAHA- tawa ng manyakis na nagbabasa

i'm so uhaw, as in!

A thirsty city girl went to a remote barrio -

Girl: saan galing your water?

Matanda: sa ilog, iha.

Girl: ha? dini-drink nyo po yan?

Matanda: duh?! alangan namang i-CHEW namen ryt?!

1+1, 2+2...

Teacher: Juan, 1+3?

Juan: Hmm, 4 po mam!

Teacher: Very good! O ikaw naman Pedro, 3+1?

Pedro: Ayan na! Ayan na! Put*ngina pag ung mahirap sakin!

ano daw?

sa buhay natin dpat patas ang laban!

pag inano ka, anuhin mo din!

pag ayaw magpaano, wag ka din papaano.

pro syempre, pgdating sa anuhan,

pgbigyan mo na lalo na kung minsan lng,

kesa nman iba pa ang anuhin nya.

kaw din..

bka isang araw gus2 mo na ng ano pero wla ng aano sayo! ano?

Gud day na nga lang!

i'll take "churva" for 1000, alex

MS. GAY PAGEANT

HOST: how can we uplift our economy today eventho wer in crisis?

GAY: (namutla) mga bakla... kla ko ba ms gay to? QUIZBEE pla! kaloka! :)

wish ko lang

May isang panget n bbae n humiling sa knyang gwapong FairyGodFather -

Keka: may mapa ako d2 ng america, dlhin moko dun para matagpuan ang aking prince charming.

FGF: d pwede! dito lang gumagna powers ko!

Keka: o sige, maging mortal ka nalang at pakasalan ako.

FGF: patingin nga ulit ng put*nginang mapang yan at bka magawan ng paraan!

bugtong bakla

Titser: Juan, kung ako'y asawa ng tatay, nagsilang s mga anak, at ang twag nila skin ay ilaw ng tahanan, ako ay isang?..




Juan: Bakla, sir! Isang ambisyosang bakla!

bisaya ka man, 'day?

May isang taong pmapatay sa mga bisaya. Nbalitaan i2 nila inday, marites at teresa.

Isang araw, nakita ng killer c inday. Tanong nya: "bisaya k ba?" "HENDI!" ang sagot ni inday. PATAY.

Ngpraktis ngayon cna teresa at marites, "HINDE, HINDE!" Tapos nakita naman ng killer c teresa. "Bisaya k b?" "HINDE!" "Anung pangaln mo?" "TIRISA." PATAY.

Ngprktis ulit si marites, "HINDE, MARITES.." Nakita sya ng kiler. "bisaya k b?" "HINDE" "Ano pangalan mo?" "MARITES!" Umalis ang kiler... at sa tuwa, napacgaw si marites...




"YIS!"

PATAY!

a balanced lyf

alwys maintain a balanced lyf:

b strong
bt nt
rude

humble
bt nt
weak

kind
bt nt
timid

confidnt
bt nt
arrognt




n most of all..




ATTRACTIVE
pro knwari
UNAWARE :)

o, wg mgbuhat ng sariling bangko..
Dpat unaware ka! :)

adieu

"Sometimes people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons, but because they just know that things will get worse if they stay. Leaving can be a tough act, and it's harder when people can hardly understand you for doing so..."




- Litanya ni inday nung magpapaalam na kay Sir at Maam

banat ni imbisiboy

Boy: invisible ako...




Girl: talaga?




Boy: can you see me?




Girl: oo naman...




Boy: how about tomorrow night?


Ayos! :)

ang matipunong anak

MAGSASAKA: Lalake na talaga ang aking anak kasi nagsasaka na at brusko pa!

Ano ang plano mong itanim sa sakahan ko aking anak?




ANAK: Flowers papa! Flowers!

nay penge pera

Mandarayang nanay-

Anak: Ma, hingi po ako ng 500.

Nanay: Ano?! 400? Laki naman ng 300! Aanhin mo 200? Kala mo ba madaling kitain ang 100! Di basta basta pinupulot ang 50! Sige na nga! Eto na 20 pesos na hinihingi mo!

karatistang kwasimido

KUBA: tnuks0 nla akong kuba! Mkapg aral nga ng karate...

(after 6 months...)

FRIEND: galing mo magkarate a! tnatawag k p rin b nilang kuba?

KUBA: di na!...




naging NINJA TURTLE na.

d lolo and d pokpok

Lolo wid prosti-

LOLO: Ineng magkano bayad pag nagsex tayo?

PROSTI: 1K po lolo!

(after 1hr...)

PROSTI: Lolo bakit 800 lang to?!

LOLO: RA 7432 otherwise known as the senior citizen's act. May 20% discount ako. Karapatan ko yan!

bumagsak ka, anak?!

Nay: ano itong malaking zero s tst papr mo?!

Anak: d yan zero nay, naubusan lang ng star ang titser ko kya binigyan nya ko ng FULL MOON! Moon lang yan nay pramiz! :)

stop it i say!

Stop your raucous behavior! It is bound to result in property damage and if that happens, there will be corresponding punishment inflicted upon you!




- Inday, pinagbabawalan and mga bata na mag maglikot

an idiomatic love story

A love story-

A persona ingrata from my alma mother asked for my number so we can keep intact.

Sbi ko: Connect me if im wrong, but r u asking me ouch?

Sbi nya: The?!

I mean, tel me 2 d marines and kapal! The nerd! Naiyak ako sa galit. I cried buckles of tears.

Tapos sabi nya: Don't cry. Isipin mo na lang dis is a blessing in the sky. Iregardles of my feelings, lets go out na ren.

Now we're so in love. Mute in epidemic na yang past. Thanks god we swalowd our fried. Kasi i'm 33 na & i'm running our time. After 2 weeks, he asked me: will u marriage me? Hay! Talagang wen it rains its four. This is true good to be true! Love is a many splendor at khit d sya ganong cute, beauty is in d eyes nman d ba?

Sabi nya: like twice.

Kaya advise ko sa inyo take d risk! Just burn d bridge wen u get der. Life is shorts. If you make a mistake, we'll just pray 4 d external repose of ur soul.

I second emotion!

suportahan ta ka

ANAK: Dad may sabihin ako sa nyo.

DAD: Ano yon anak? May problema b?

ANAK: Magshift nalang ako sa fine arts. Sana maintindihan mo.

DAD: Leche! Tapusin mo muna and ELEMENTARY!

prosti at adik

Luv story ng prosti at adik-

Adik: wil u marry me?

Prosti: oo, pero k lang ba sa u khit mron akong past?

Adik: oo ok lang! wla rin nman akong futur eh!

maligayang araw

Did you know that in Malaysia, the word ARAW refers to the person's SEX ORGAN?! Wala lang... nasabi ko lang. Anyway sana maligaya ang ARAW mo ngayon. :)

mula 80s hanggang 90s

kblang k b s huling taon ng dekada '80 at mga unang taon ng '90?

>kila2 mo cna shaider, bioman at maskd rider blak

>alam mo jingle ng nano-nano

>nglaro k ng 10-20

>alam mo ang universal song n 'uwian na'

>ngsayaw k ng macarena at boombstc

>alam m ibig sbhin ng 'time first'

>alam mo n imprtante and period, no erase!

>nilagyn m ng pritos ring bwat daliri mo

>meron kng pencil case n madami pndutan

>kila2 m c remy,cedie at prncs sarah

>>>then it means...




MATANDA KA NA! =)

hubadera

GIRL BASTOS: itay nagbold po ako sa magasin. tngnan nyo po picture ko sa page 10.

ITAY: nako anak! hiniya mo ng husto ang ating pamilya! wala ng masnakakahiya pa sa ginawa mo!

GB: Meron pa po tay! Tingnang nyo sa page 16...




si INAY.

sampalin ng pera

Kpg may nangaway sayo, eto sbhin mo...

gus2 mo sampalin kta ng pera?!




tig bebenchingc0!
Nakaplastik pa!

inglis & spanis

BOY1: Tanungin mo ko ng English, sasagutin kita ng Spanish.

BOY2: What is more important? Heart or mind?




BOY1: Spanish...

nge! =)

comflit & pinish

Wat's d difference between COMPLETE & FINISHED?




when you marry d ryt person, u're COMPLETE




bt wen u marry d wrong one, u're FINISHED! c".)

embalsamemucho

MiSiS: Bat nman inuwi mo p d2 work m0?!
MiSteR: S0ri dear! kelangan kc madeliver na to bukas.
MiSiS: HALLER! ikaw lang ang EMBALSAMADOR na nag-uuwi ng trabaho!

valer kuberch

Valer kuberch
kahit jutay
ang julamantrax donchi
ay anek-anek!
Nyongkamas
at nutring,
nyogarilyas
at kipay
nyitaw, nyotaw, jutani!
Kundol, jutola,
jupot jolabastrax,
at mega join-join pa
jobanox, nyustasa!
Nyubuyax, nyomatis,
nyowang at luyax
and around da keme
ay fulnes ng linga!

-bahay kubo, gay version

fastest thing in the world

4 men were asked: what is the fastest thing in the world?

German says THOUGHT,

American says BLINK OF AN EYE,

Aussie says LIGHT SWITCH,

d Pinoy says DIARRHEA! "Lit mi eksplin, he says, dis murning, i hab istumak eek, i run to di tuylet but bipur i kud tink, blenk, or iben tarn un di lyt swits, oww, syet dir en my pants oredi!"

nahilo ako at bumagsak

Minsan nahilo ako at bumagsak sa floor sa harap ng madaming tao..




Ayun..




Nauso and DROP DEAD GORGEOUS. =)

dumaan ako sa harap ng girls

Minsan npadaan ako sa harapan ng mga girls..




Ayun..




nauso ang love at first sight. =)

sabi mo cute ka

Minsan, nagkukwentuhan tayo ng bigla mong sinabi na cute ka..




ayun..




nauso ang joke!!! =)

baga

Anu ang tawag sa taong walang baga?




wala LUNG... =)

ang buwan at mga bituin

Pag may tao n ngsabi sau n ibbgay nya ang buwan at bituin, wag kng makinig..

dahl khit sungkitin nya ang buwan at bituin...




aanhin mo mga un?

blingbling? =)

mga papa speaking gay lingo

Imagine if straight guys speak in gay lingo...

Dude: bakit di mo chinuva yung girlalu? Malaki naman ang susey ng lola mo ah?

Hunk: winnie cordero nga dude sa susey, melanie marquez naman sa brainwaves. Wit na.




Jaworski while coaching: keber sa kalaban, just focus. We cannot afford to luz valdez. Getlakin nyo ung last freetrow. Windangin yung mga julaban. Ok! Go for gold to the highest level mga chorva! Gow lang!

sugat ni yaya

Boy Bastos naliligo kasama ni yaya -

BoyBastos:Yaya ano yan(sabay turo sa TOOT-TOOT ni yaya)?

Yaya:Ah, yan? Tawagin mo nalang yang SUGAT.

BB:Tang*nang sugat yan nasa P*KE!

walang kaaway si lola

Sermon ng pari: Dpat tayong matu2 magptwad ng kapwa. Cno d2 ang may mga kaaway?

(lhat ngtaas ng kamay pwera c lola)

Pari:Lola, ilang taon na ho kayo?

Lola:96 na ako, father.

Pari:Wala po kayong mga kaaway?

Lola:Wala father. Patay na mga put*ngina.

mudra... pudra...

Mudra,pudra,getsung kez tinapey.
Sister,brother, getsung kez kafey.
Lahat ng getsung kez ay kemer kemerlu.
Ang magkakawiz ay pipingutin kez!




-dalawang batang BADING, naglalaro ng "nanay-tatay" =)

si optimus prime ay magiting na mandirigma

"SI OPTIMUS PRIME AY MAGITING NA MANDIRIGMA"

Ipasa sa 10 tao at magiging AUTOBOT ka sa loob ng 2 araw.

TOTOO to! Ung pinsan ko nagTRANSFORM na...




naging TRICYCLE! =)

mahahalagang bagay

Malalaman mo lang ang halaga ng isang bagay kapag...




May price tag! =)

may sakit si lola

Lola at the doctor's office -

Lola: Doc, ano pa ang gagawin para sa sakit ko?

Doc: che-chemo po kayo, lola.

Lola: A ganun ah! tit*mo ren!

hindi tao, hindi hayop...

Miss, alam mo ba, hindi tayo tao..




Hindi tayo hayop..




At hindi din tayo halaman..




BAGAY TAYO!
BAGAY! =)

The Pinoy "Thriller"

counterclockwise

Priest sees man doing station of the cross -

Priest: Sir, pabaligtad po ang station of the cross ninyo.

Man: kaya pala palakas ng palakas si Kristo...

what is love?

Love is not finding someone to go to bed with, but finding someone you want to wake up in the morning with...




naked... so parang ganun din. :)

a is for epol

Cno ang pinakatangang babae na isinilang sa sanlibutan?




sagot:




Si EBA...Bakit?




nakita nya hubad na katawan ni adan... APPLE BA NAMAN ANG ISINUBO!!!
Dba tanga?!

save closet space

Thought for life: We all love to spend lots of money buying new clothes but never realize that some of the best moments in life are enjoyed w/o clothes! :D

why teynkyu...

Tanong: Why did you join this contest?

SAGOT:
"ME? Join THIS contest? Why did I?...




Thank you..." (sabay ikot at walk away)

-formr bb. pilipinas candidate

couple's vacation

Man to priest counselor: My wife & I can't agree on our vacation. I want to go to Boracay.
Priest: where does she want to go?
Man: She wants to go w/ me...

hurt hart hurt hart

dnt
hurt
d hart
hu
didnt
hurt ur
hart
bt hurt
d hart
hu hurt
ur hart
bt hw
cn u hurt
d hart hu
hurt ur heart
if...




she sells
sheshells by
the seash0re.
=p

when life gets stormy...

When life gets stormy, remember to anchor deep... Say a prayer & hold on! Don't be surprised if someone comes across the waters to give you a hand...




Ako yon...
Nasa YACHT, u kno? Sosiness & evrytng. =)

mga pamatay na hirit

mga pamatay na hirit:

kumain k b ng asukal?

ang tamis kc ng ngiti mo.


may lahi k bang keybord?

type kc kita.


papupulis kta!

ninakaw mo kc pus0 ko.


r u a dix0nary?

coz u add mining 2 my lyf.


i lost my #...

can i hav urs?


i 4got ur name...

can i col u mine?


at ang pamatay na reply:

excuse me, kumain ka b ng mais?

ang CORNy mo kc! =p

what did you said?

Judge: If you had the chance to become the nation's president for one day, what is the first thing that you would do?

Beauty contestant: Thank you so much for your thought-provoking question. But first and foremost, I would like to say to you...




Come again?

(ay inday mag linis ka ng tenga!)

ano ang gagawin mo?

Pg nadulas at nadapa sa harap ng crush...gan2 dpt ang banat: "see how i fell 4 you?" =)

(haha! ulul!)

ang sweet pala ng alphabet

sana "T" na lang ako... para im always right next to "U"... =)

(how switz naman!)

and i quote...

"Ikaw n nga ang nkaapak, kw p 2ng glit!"

-tae


"Hndi lht ng green, msustansya."

-plema


"Hndi lht ng maacm, may vit.C"

-kili2


"Hay naku!Wag mo n kong bilugin!"

-kulangot


"Ayoko lng nman na sa harap ng mrming tao,gnun mo nlng ako kung ideny!"

-utot

wag mag paa!

Overheard sa may dibidihan...

Nanay at anak tumitingin ng mga dibidi -

Nanay: Magnda kya tong pelikulng "Sleepers" (staring bradpit at kevbacon)?

Anak: Sleeeepers? Ano yooon? Tsinelaaaas?

(tama anak! laging magtsnelas para wag madumhan ang paa!)

mabuting anak

Dear boyet,

Naipdala ko n ang 50 libo tuition mo,pnagbili na nmen ung klabaw ntin. Ang mhal pla ng C0unterStrike na kurso mo! Wla nrin pla tau mga baboy, naipagbili nrin nmen pra dun sa cnasabi mung project, n0kia N75 b yun? Ang mahal nman ng pr0ject m0! Ksma din dun 7 libo pra sa field trip ny0 sa Mall of Asia. Mlayo b un, bkt ang mahal? Isasanla p nmin ang palayan para mbili mo ung instrumentong i-pod. Kmportable ka b dyn s bording haus mo, victorias b un? Kmusta na u?

Ngmamahal,
nnay&ttay

pls pass

"WALA LANG"

pass this to 128 people and nothing will happen...





...promise! this is very effective. I just tried it, wala talagang nangyari!

keri lang churva

Pari: Ang mgA bAkla'y wlang lugar sa Kaharian ng Langit!!!

Gays: Keri lng FAther! Dun nLang kami sa RAINBOW mag slide slide EVER! =)

seller of unhatched & incubated offspring of aquatic birds

I'm so sick and tired of this cruel life! In solitude I tread this seemingly endless road amidst the spooky, cold and uncertain darkness of the night. Shouting relentlessly at the top of my lungs just to reach your ears and answer your exotic cravings...





-Magbabalut, sosyal at depressed

kadiri naman u...

Nsa elevator k w/ ur crush...

sudenly...

npautot crush mo...

Ntwa ka...





at lumobo sipon mo...

oh sino ngayon ang mas nka2hiya?

(eh di ikaw! bwahahaha!)

Mhakna!

Mhakna!
o-on ta ploh, Mhakna!
Imisamoh, Mhakna!
Uyu-eso, Mhakna!
Umo-u-wo-u... 2x




ngongo, kumakanta ng SMACK THAT...

masarap?

Kagabi nanaginip ako.

Kumakain daw ako ng cottoncandy.
Maraming cottoncandy.
Maraming maraming cottoncandy.
Naubos ko.

Pagka gising ko...




Wala na akong unan!

minumura mo bako?

PUCHA!...









- kaaway ng ACHO.

yagit

Kpag
nkta
mo
ako
na
mrumi...
warat2
ang damit...
wlang
tsnelas
at
nsa
gtna
ng
kalye...





plz wg
kang
la2pit...




May sh00ting ako...
bawal ang fans. =)

takot ako eh!

Sigaw ng halimaw: AWOOOOOO!!!

Iyak ng bata: Wag p0!

Sagot ng halimaw: okei... =)

(wow how nice naman that halimaw!)

TNT si dan

DAN TORRES frm Bicol nagTNT sa USA. 1 araw, nagGrocery sya-

Cashier: VISA or Master?
Dan(kabado): Hanap VISA ko! (takbo siya, sakay auto nya - harurot! But he needs gas)
Gas boy: pay 1st!
Dan(nerbyos): Patay, PAPERS daw! (run sya fone booth 2 col home)
AutoFone greeting: AT&T, can I help u?
Dan(namutla): Alam na TNT ako! (labas sya ng booth pawis na pawis)
Tanong ng nxt kano sa pila: Are u DONE?
Dan: name ko alam nila?!
Kano: Tourist?
Dan: pati apelyido!
Kano: Be cool!
Dan: patay pati probinsya ko alam!!!

mag-amang centipede

c baby centpede lumapt k daddy centpede at may bnulong.. hnmatay c daddy!




Ano kaya bnulong ni baby?




SAG0T:
"dadi, pbili slippers.."

thank you mamser!

Ma'am/sir,

I hereby render my irrevocable resignation as your employee, effective today. It has been a pleasant stay in your company; but owing to personal reasons, I am compelled to move on. I would like to thank you and your good management for the wonderful experience accorded to me during my stay in your company.

Yours truly,
Inday

oo nga naman!

Question:
Bakit hinihila ang tali?









Sige nga, itulak mo nga! =)

ebolusyon

Kung totoo ang sinasabi nilang nanggaling ang mga tao sa unggoy...









...eh bakit may mga taong mukhang kabayo?!?

churva!

Did you know?

CHURVA has its etymology from the greek word CHEORVAMUS meaning "for lack of the right word to say or in place of something one wants to express but cannot verbalize."

Charing! =)

mag-inang centipede

M0mmy Centipede: h0y,mkupad! Knna p kta inuutusang bumili ng suka, d kprn nkkaalis?!

Baby Centipede: haller,nay!

..Nag-tsitsinelas p kya ak0! Excited?

dear ttay&nnay

Sulat ng anak s kñang mgulang:

dear ttay&nnay,

bkt ño bnenta ang kalabaw e akin nman un!? Galit tlga ako! Mula ngyn,hndi ño na ako anak!!

ur FRIEND,
boyet.. =)

HeLoW p0h!

HeLoW p0h!

Hir na me poH sa bLoGGer p0h! pOst LaNg me p0h nG kAkaTawAng jOwX, oTei? TeNkyu p0h! teyKer gAdbLes p0h!